An Unpublished Blog from October 2017

Tootling along at around 20-22 mph on the old bone shaker, down Westferry Road when I hear a horn being blow from behind. I was in the middle in the road, wary of potential doors opening up from a long line of parked cars. I duly turned and gave the driver the one finger salute, assured in the knowledge that I didn't have any obligation to hug the line of parked cars. As soon as the driver had the chance overtake me, he slammed his brakes on, causing me to slam on my anchors. The car turned out to be tacky blue Jag, the modern imitation of the Morse classic. The driver was a middle-aged hairy, pony tailed cockney yob, was now level with me, and wound his window who and yelled something like "you f@cking c@nt. I'll f@cking smash you off the f@cking road, you cunt etc.". Clearly, a very angry psycho. Luckily, I my brain was engaged and I just eye-balled him and said nought. He sped off and turned left not far ahead. I have to admit, it made the old sphincter twitch!